Saturday, July 25, 2009

On being a sponge

I can't quite get a handle on why I've been rolling my eyes so much lately. There's so much going on in this town, why don't I find that at all energizing?! I'm at least slowly learning new things (and learning of new things to be learned, possibly elsewhere) at work, too. More or less. I don't know. Compartmentalize, Lori. Maybe I need an attitude adjustment.

Ugh, what a terrible voiceover for this movie of my life. Cue record scratch sound.

Anyway, I was talking to my sister last night (during which she recited for me the first 5 chapters of these BRILLIANT Twilight series recaps --ladies, give this link to the man, or just plain friend, in your life who doesn't want to read all 6 billion fursploding sparkly vampire family angsty pages Twilight-- my sister's read all of the books, I got through the first one...though now that I know there is apparently werewolf TYPOGRAPHY, I might have to indulge) -- so anyway, I'm talking to the sister and she's all, you never take pictures anymore, and I'm like i know, its a crazy weird symptom, i have never not liked taking pictures. And she's like I still check your flickr every day in the hopes that it will once again become awesome.

Clunk. It's not just the internet feeds that have lost their pizzazz, either! arg!

I don't know what to do! I try. I will keep trying. There must be some sort of perspective I'm not peering from that's making me extra angsty and also extremely boring. I used to be a total sponge, soaking up my favorite weird parts of whatever with my notepad and camera, using it to fuel my work in business and community organizing and writing and dancing and art appreciating...but now - thud...clunkclunkclunk. I don't even have the energy to fake it till I make it here anymore.

So, confessional over. I will fake it. And I will make it. Altogether now.

I'm beginning a 12 week study-a-go-go for some standardized tests...if you've read this blog (which probably means we're friends), the gradutat work pursuit will feel like a natural progression. I hope I get to teach! I was once pretty great at studying, so we'll see how this pans out. It's nice to have goals! I'm also pretty stoked for the essays both on the test and on the applications (which I actually have to save up for, applying to schools costs hundreds of dollars...wtf) b/c dang.

In other news, I'm going to be learning Spanish - 3 for 1! (would you like to teach me?)- so I can go all Enrique Penelosa (roll call - Van Jones and Majora Carter) on you.

Study with me.

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