I'm taking a sketch class, and I did this free writing reflection moment to get some ideas. I figured it should go somewhere. Hope you like it Blythe! (only person email subscribed to this ish and I'm not even sure that works anymore!!! Keeping up with the internet joneses over here)
I have barely spellchecked it! It's like Kerouac!
I was a hostess at the Casa Gallardo, a rich family that y catholic neighbor taught in private school. But that did not help me get any special treatment. I was a hostess, and I was kindof surprised that the tables had numbers. All the families that needed seating seemed to hate me. I remember being like, don't they think or care about me as a human??!!! They should care about me as a human!
My fellow hostess and I were both hard core sheltered academic idealist types - she was going to Harvard in the fall and I was going to Penn, and we talked about SATS and how hard they were and how stupid people were. She quit within a week. I lasted about 2 months - because I am trying to be loyal. That was stupid. I still have not learned the lesson that some strategic disloyalty is really the best thing you can do for yourself.
There was a bartender with an earring who kept on coming to the hostess table t like, raw on the tables and talk, and I was like dude! you should be at the bar and quick fucking messing with my hostess shit. Then some other waitress (who would always get on my case about having kids sit at her tables, and how she hated families and waiting on families and I was like Charyl, it's a FAMILY RESTAURANT everyone who comes in is a family) - this waitress was like, you know what Lori, he has an illegitimate child. And that was when I figured it out that he was flirting me - and I was of course horrified. I was just insulted that he - who i considered an adult (he must've been like 23) would FLIRT with me I mean how rude. It wasn't an "oh i'm ugly i am undeserving of flirts" moment, it was more of a - he is an adult and this is just WRONG and also how dare he.
I constantly had to get people chips from this dresser that had a giant metal heating apparatus in it. And I had to wear a shirt with a lot of chilies on it and the uniform was black pants but I didn't own any black p[ants. Everyone was like chill out its a great way to make friends and I was like THIS IS HOW PEOPLE MAKE FRIENDS!?!
We also had a manager who not so secretly hated me - he'd say things about my attitude, even though I maybe said all of 5 words every shift - and those were mostly to the earring bartender guy, who I now remember had bleached hair (it was the era of nsync) . This manager would always use words that were not really the right word, and me and the snooty hostess laughed at him. HE tried to talk to us about our FUTURE in the restaurant biz and we were like DUDE we barely have a present in the restaurant biz go away. Also i was shocked how many families came to casa gallardo on the fourth of July - like, number one you're a family cook a meal on the holiday, and number 2 it's a mexican restaurant and none of you are like celebrating being Mexican American so what are you doing.
and here are the sketches I thought of:
- worlds most oblivious girl gets insulted whenever anyone flirts with her #storyofmylife
- restaurant manager thinks everyone in his restaurant wants to become a restaurant mogul, but really they're just teenagers, so he's crafted a giant training program
- commercial for the real world for honor roll students (yes, people don't just remember where you're sitting, there's a chart and each table has a NUMBER! Many of the people you meet will have unfortunate haircuts and illegitimate children. Your superiors will use double negatives! get used to it)
- People in family restaurant get increasingly pissed of the more FAMLY-LIKE it gets
- Restaurant workers so loyal to their workplace it's like the knights of the roundtable (Not might IS spirte, might FOR SPRITE, )
- Commercial for a furniture store where every piece of furniture has a different place for nacho chips
I'll post whatever I write.